Why Naruto Sucks Big Black Fuzzy Balls

Why Naruto Sucks Big Black Fuzzy Balls
February 28 21:08 2009 Print This Article

So Naruto what got himself fighting over some other crappy stupid dude that’s impossibly strong (not unlike the other impossibly strong dudes, this one – mucho stronger!) but apparently still beatable by some random shit using the way way underused Kage Bunshin (Shadow Clone) Card Trick.

So, apparently this time, he got beat up, not unlike the last N times he got beat up though, this was way way way way way way worserer. (How can you tell? Well, its because he runs out of chakra and stumbles a lot! And there’s a lot more scratches on his face, like twice more!) So little happy chick Hinata what got herself in front of a freight train to protect Naruto from his demise exactly 2.3 seconds before our intrepid hero meets his… whatever kind of thing makes Nine Tailed Demon Foxes.

This angers Naruto and, possibly before getting dead, what got himself real angry like, and amazingly becomes uber powerful. Like all, extremely miraculous-like. Shits getting real dawg. Fitty cent kinda real. All up in your business-like.

Gangsta-talk aside, this topic has come up recently, and I had something to say… probably not the thing everybody wanted to hear though:

I’d hate to break it down to one’s and zero’s, but the whole “my friend’s cap got busted now I am mad and you will die” routine is probably standard mangacrap story plotline hero-win device number 1.

Most manga storylines run around these and it was great the first 100 or so times you see it in the world of anime and manga, but these days, especially with Naruto. Its. Just. Blatant.

Its like the author hits a “Make Naruto Win By Some Random Coincidence With Blatant Use of Impossible Circumstances” button and all is fine and dandy.

Next time I bet Sakura’ll get beat up and then Naruto turns into Super Saiyan level 101.5 and a half. Thanks, Mr. Obvious for the mind-boggling plot twist!

And now I apologize for illegally using gangsta-talk and sarcasm to make a point. (Not really.) But I do apologize for namedropping Fitty cent though. It was not fair for him to be related to a Naruto post.

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About Article Author

Alexei Rivera
Alexei Rivera

Alex likes doges and wowes. Much bio.

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1 Comment

  1. Swagger Of Man
    February 28, 21:24 #1 Swagger Of Man

    Lol, all up in yo face kind. I’d like to think that that plotline, “u beat up my friend now I’m mad and ur dead”, was popularized by dragonball. Maybe way-back. But people need to get over it, time to move on.

    Cool post man two thumbs up.

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